Quote from No.2 Local AFK on May 23, 2020, 10:29 PM

Hello dear exquisite and most gracious with the highest level of prestige sirs and Madams, I hope my written article finds you all in your best and most prosperous condition.

Enough sir language let me provide you with a useful short sentence guide to every single hero to help u get an idea on which hero to pick in rank/classic/vs. AI since picking a hero is of the same importance for all the aforementioned modes.

I have 95 heroes and that’s a useless point thing to point out indeed but I just wanted to say that

Now let’s start:

1) Balmond -> Really wants to know your name, very friendly but turn mad and smash u with big hammer

2) Miya -> Apparently can kill u from a mile away but needs to breathe down ur neck to hit u, Gatling gun approved.

3) Aldous-> First 10 mins, sad little boy. Last 10 mins-> Fisting Fisting Fisting

4) Alpha-> Has a free printer scanner and a drone that has a range similar to Mustafi’s shot distance

5) Alucard -> Memelord diving 1v5 ded 2 buffs ez

6) Argus -> first 10 mins like ur dad MIA, last 10 minutes slicy slicy

7) Badang -> wall fisting session repeat wall fisting session repeat

8) Bane -> Discount Jack sparrow and has PETA membership so free access to sharks

9) Chou -> China Boiiiiiiii with more knockups he can make u pregnant

10) Dyrroth -> Alucards brother in feeding and has a thicc sister

11) Freya -> THICCCCC SHIELLLDDDDDSSSSSSS

12) Guinevere-> Can’t land ur S2 cuz damn she fine af so distractions occur

13) Hilda -> Viet cong soldier excelling in engaging from bushes

14) Jawhead -> Ez enemy first blood+ excellent minion thrower

15) Kaja -> Will lash you and send u back to slavery

16) Lapu Lapu -> 1+1= 1 big fucking overpowered shit sword

17) Leomord -> Mythic boosted by his horsy

18) Martis -> Ultimate KS machine

19) Masha -> Tryhard pick in classic and objective taker so definitely bronze or silver rating

20) Minsithar-> Excellent hooker with an escort service of 4

21) Roger -> discount twilight saga

22) Ruby -> One slash big HP stoks

23) Silvanna -> The thicc one in the family, forces u to 1v1 custom in her ult

24) Sun -> ShADIW CLONE JUTSU

25) Thamuz-> Lava boiiii lava fucking disgusting spell vamp

26) Terizla -> Has a massive hammer who likes to swing it around and smashes u hard (in the head relax I’m keeping it family friendly)

27) X.borg -> can burn anything except for bushes cuz why not

28) Zilong -> Zing zong with a spear that likes to toss his enemy around

29) Akai -> Discount Dragon Warrior Po

30) Atlas -> Doesn’t want to be alone wants to make friends and hug them together

31) Baxia -> DAYSEEE ME ROLLIN DAY HATIN

32) Bellerick -> U SHOOT ME NO U intensifies

33) Esmeralda -> has a weird fetish for shields

34) Franco -> maybe a good hooker otherwise flicker ult repeat

35) Gatot -> can’t be bothered saying his full name and likes to make an ‘allow me to introduce myself’ entrance

36) Grock -> Doesn’t want to be your enemy yet can assassinate the entire enemy lineup, very humble.

37) Hylos -> HYPER SPEED

38) Johnson -> Fake taxi certified

39) Khufra -> disgusting bouncing Pile if bandages that tells u to sit down

40) Lolita -> likes to hammer people with her big boiiii hammer ( Detective Sherlock moment right there lol)

41) Minotaur -> now I am angry!!! Flameshot: ok I don’t care

42) Tigreal -> flicker ult get stunned die repeat flicker ult get stunned repeat

43) Uranus-> A tank with massive balls that likes to swing them around in public

44) Fanny -> cable lady with buff without buff walking lady

45) Gusion -> I am a Gusion main therefore I am more skilled than U

46) Hanzo -> Hibbity hobbity ur blue is my property

47) Hayabusa -> Gets inside u and unleashes his shurikans ( giggity )

If u have any comments on my guide feel free to message me thank you!

 

(Posted by George-Aj)